Thursday, November 15, 2012


God has made everything beautiful in its time.
Ecclesiastes 3:11

As I was leaving work on Wednesday and looked in my rear-view mirror to back out of my parking spot, as was startled to see a stranger looking back at me.  Who was that crypt keeper in the mirror?  Surely not me.  

But it was me.

It seems that in my effort to stretch out my last few minutes in bed that morning, I woke up 20 minutes late.  My dash to readiness was fast an furious.  It wasn't until the end of the day that I realized I had not put make-up on.

And no one said a word.
Well, a few people asked me if I wasn't feeling well.  
But still...

All make-up aside...I've aged 10 years since Steve died.  I am not the vibrant, smiling, happy-go-lucky girl of my past.  

That makes me sad.
I miss that inner glow of beauty that being loved brings.

Perhaps God will bring it to me again.



DonnaReid said...

I know what glow you're talking about because when I look at current pictures of myself and compare them to the "before he died" pictures there is a startling difference. Hoping with you for a return of that beautiful inner glow!

sheila said...

I lost my husband to pancreas cancer August 29, 2012. I have been miserably ever since. I having crying spells everyday. It will be two years this year. I wonder if I will ever get better. I pray to the good Lord everyday to give me strength and to direct my paths. I hope everyone will soon get better and be able to go on with your lives. Love to all Sheila

Unknown said...

I just wanted to thank you for your article blog. I was always a vibrant kind of quirky woman with a massive amount of friends and well just family and extended people who were like adopted family. Then I was married -and well the person was in a nut shale a fraud. We began so young and worked so hard preparing. THe big thing was problems were multiplying , but by the end I was really running for my life. I had lost some of my connections over the years, so a smaller friendship base and family base due to deaths. ---I was a strong person and was determined to be something great/ I was so inspired to go back to school meet new people I was probably just happy to get a second chance. I fell in love with the most amazing man and we had ten years of heaven --but soon I was to experience your pain you mentioned and ten years later --I can say maybe I can leave my home again without anxiety--sadly I am older and I have to make all new friends and even new family but your article blog has made me at least no longer afraid ty