Weak Heart - Strong God

It's been a tumultuous couple of weeks.  In addition to the stress of the holidays and the travel and gift buying, I've had some things come up completely unrelated that were shockingly unanticipated.

One step forward, two steps back.
Go ahead...kick a girl when she's down.
Merry Christmas to me.

I've been emotional, mad, a tad bitter, and now resigned to the fact that God knows a lot better than I do.

I've held this matter on my heart and laid it in God's hands.  This whole widow deal has taught me that I am in control of nothing.

Maybe that's a good thing.
I'd probably mess it up anyway.

Today someone remarked, "You are the strongest person I know."  I gave them a weak smile and thanked them for the compliment as my insides rang with "IF YOU ONLY KNEW WHAT A JIGGLING MASS OF JELLO I AM, YOU WOULD PITY ME RATHER THAN BE PROUD OF ME."

I am NOT strong.
I have a very strong God.
Thank goodness.

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Cyna