Showing posts with label God Wink. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God Wink. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

God Wink

Saturday is a watershed night for me.  After 6 months of practice...costume and shoe purchases, eyelash extensions and a fake tan...I will perform on stage in our local Rotary Club's "Dancing With Our Stars" fund raiser for children's literacy.  

I was stunned to be asked to be a "star."  I have no ballroom dancing experience and I don't have a "high profile" in our community.  However, one of the organizers is a friend and she thought this challenge was just what I needed to get "the light back in my eyes."

I was blessed to be paired with a pro who was a patient, kind, and gentle teacher.  I was anxious about being touched, and he graciously waited until I was ready.  After several months without touching he finally said, "You know...eventually, we DO have to touch...close your eyes and dance."  And did I dance!  

We are dancing the samba and while every step isn't perfect, we really have a good time out there shaking our stuff.  I hope we do well Saturday, but even if we come in dead last, this has been a winning experience for me.

I've fallen in love with ballroom dancing.  I began taking a ballroom dancing continuing education class last night through the local university to expand and fine tune my skills.   It was a little awkward because I didn't have a partner and I felt that sinking sensation of being alone in a couples world again.  Then they played the first song to teach us the waltz, "With You I'm Born Again" by  Billy Preston and Syreeta Wright.

That song was sung at my wedding.
And it felt like Steve was saying..."Go for it baby!"
It was a God wink for sure.

I'm going for it, Steve.
I hope I make you proud.

27
Cyna

Monday, June 27, 2011

Twenty-Seven on the 27th


Today is my eldest son's 27th birthday.  Twenty-seven on the 27th.  The coincidences of the numbers is obvious.  The 27 numerology is like a God Wink.  (Thank you, Jennifer for sharing this book with me:  When God Winks at You: How God Speaks Directly to You Through the Power of Coincidence  by Squire Rushnell.)  I felt like Steve was telling my son, "I love you all the time."

The last time my son was with this father while he was still conscious was on his 26th birthday.  I don't think that is lost on him and it has been a somewhat difficult birthday for him.  He goes tomorrow to have the family crest tattooed over his heart.  This is his tribute to his father...and my birthday gift to him.

I have too often discounted my sons' grief.  I've been so consumed with my own that I have failed to meet their needs during this difficult time.  I hope one day they will forgive me for not doing my best for them.  Now that I am coming out of the fog of numbness, I will vow to do better for them...and they deserve it.

27
Cyna